refreshed

things feel better for me today..have been wandering in e 'desert' for e few days..started w all e fatigue accumulated from e work i doing for e past two wks..adding e marathon training..wor..can't describe e experience man..yet it does show how distracted n weak e human heart can be in times of not guarded well..ppl irritates u more easily..u lose focus oso..get more emotional..tis was not wat i expected or went thru since may..it was terrible..being entangled w all e negative emotions..

but guess God always has His way of speaking to me distinctively..that is thru ppl and running..running helps me to juz displace all the negative emotions unto my legs..as i think of nthg except improving my speed and lung capacity for e upcoming half marathon..feels good man when timing is on track..i feel lifted and at peace..haha..ppl as well..esp those who understand u..many a times..e prob w me is dat i pref to carry my own burdens instead of turning to ppl at times like tis cant go to God that readily..it helps man..cos talking to ppl make u more in check w reality..hey..things r not as bad as u think it is..there is still hope and encouragement to keep me going..

work is also another way or should i say keeping myself occupied..yeah..busy,busy..get u not to think of anything else except work..prob that's why i feel lost, not sure where i am heading..i dun have anything concrete that i hope to do..my life purpose..compared to when i was in uni ministry..there is more guidance and purpose in dat sense..hmm..guess no matter wat way it is..e root issue has to go back to God no matter wat..when my relationship w God is in place..everything falls in place as well..nicely w Him fitting e pieces according to his ways..not mine..