Time just passed by quickly as I finished the second cycle of my reservist. This year is more tiring compared to last yr's, rested lesser but still manageable.
This year's xmas svc was pretty normal to me, the skit was a lot less complicated and was re-packaged, used from an easter svc earlier on. Other than that, I had changed group as well. The new cg is a dynamic one, there are more ppl who are sporty here and everyone takes a fair bit of ownership in their career and spiritual life. Not bad for a start. Hope to know them more in time to come before the new unit ppl 'assume' that I have known them well which is not the case yet, 1/2 mths doesnt warrant a close friendship ba before the expectations of ministry come in. I do feel attached much to ex-cg/subD ppl when I see them around but I do know what I am doing, will stick to it. Will keep closely in touch with ex-subD ppl through various channels, not binded by 'structures'
It is with this understanding that I had learnt a major lesson for the year 2008. It is a significant one for me, in almost all aspects of my life be it career switch, in a relationship or ministry changes. Nothing short of disruptions, uncertainty and giving up one's comfort zone and lots of re-learning to do. Yet at the same time, really thank the Lord for His grace that has helped and sustained me through all these realities of life. I never know that I can give support to others in need when I myself am struggling. The past self would have withdrawn fully from people and stay in isolation. November was a mth that I was tested alot, managing some of the challenging cases and coping with other demands. I struggled at times but yet at the same time, also experience His power and strength that keeps me going on. Thank God
For this year, first major lesson I learnt that it is one's personal responsibility to take charge of his spiritual life. Having a healthy relationship with God is the key, no 'visionary' leader or brand/size/gd systems of a church or anything else can replace that because that is the only thing that will last into eternity. Of course not saying that our church will not last but it is our own walk which we are ultimately accountable. Pastors and leaders are human beings and can fail also. This year, I find myself asking the question, will I continue to serve and pursue the Lord when there is no one to guide and give me the directions?
Second lesson I learnt is that there are multiple ways of experiencing the Lord, there is no one 'exclusive' way, for eg. the familiar active outeaching and mentoring lifestyle which I have accustomed to for the past eight years, not saying that it is not important but it is not the only way, I think that the Lord can use us a lot more especially in the marketplace, our lives are already living testimonies for Him regardless of how busy we are in serving. There are so many possibilities that I have seen for myself in sports ministry and how easy and accessible it is with the internet age we are living in.
My current job is a tough one, living merely on a pay allowance every month without much of bonuses, training budget and limited supervision. I have nothing to say or compare to most of my peers who are working in govt or corporate sector. Most strangers give me the look again, finding it unbelievable or too good to be true, someone who is willing to take such risks. I find it hard to believe myself at times too =)
The limited resource environment can be challenging but yet I have gained a lot as well. The intangibles. How each case I handled comes with its own systemic issues and the exposure and learning experiences are really great, valuable and rare.
I like to think that I am already 'church planting', not the physical sense of setting up a church in a foreign country but I am pursuing this ideal of mine, interest to work with this group of youths who are lowly regarded in the elitist society of ours, living a simple life without all the material comforts, by faith in some sense. Being a social worker, doing church work of some sort. As to where I will go from here, I am still praying through and seeking his directions. I hope to pursue all the dreams that I have for Him while I am young, before I reach 30, before I settle down and have my own family. Such chasing of ideals will then have to be replaced by a more pragmatic approach.
Really hope that the year 2009 will be a year that I can take root and build on my foundations, hope to invest more time and effort in the Word and see some fruits in family, ministry and work. It is also a crucial time to see through our ppl and my youths and their families as they experience the full effects of the downturn. A helping hand is definitely needed and I have a role to play.
God bless everyone, my friends, and have a great year ahead! =)
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